Well I've booked my flight to Mindanao... the place where everyone says.... ohh don't go there, the Muslim terrorists will kidnap and behead you as they have done in the past. OK they have but there are lots of people living there and I won't be the only foreigner so I will take my chances.... of which I am obviously very confident about or I wouldn't do it... I'm no mug and I'm certainly not brave.
Anyway this afternoon while I was waiting to pick up my ticket I decided to take in a movie. I don't know why I bother as I always regret it each time and this was no different.
I enter the cinema.... I sit on the extreme right hand side block facing the screen, most Filipinos seem to like to sit in the middle and the further that I am away from them the better, as I don't have to get upset with them talking and using their cell phones.
Anyway I'm sitting there when I hear talking from behind me about 6 rows back, a young couple so I give them the head turn round look and they stop which is unusual. About 15 mins in to the movie it's all going well, only about 12/15 people in a cinema that holds between 300/400....I'm enjoying it but then of course it had to change.
Who walks into a movie after missing the first 15 mins, I don't understand that.
I'm sitting there when this young (25) attractive young girl walks in and walks into my row and says "excuse me".... I thought...you could have picked any row you want...... then she just plonks herself down in the seat right next to me and says "is it ok to sit here"... I'm so flabbergasted that I just said "yes ok".
Obviously my mind now finds it difficult to concentrate on the movie, why did she do that... is it some way of accosting me for money, is she going to touch me or something... I really don't know... your mind keeps making stupid guesses, is she the girl that was sitting behind me with her boyfriend is this her way of getting back at me.... is she a private detective and is using me so that she can watch someone... is it a guy dressed as a woman.... why oh why did she have to sit here !! Should I move !!
I sit there and try to just be as normal as I can and watch the movie, what should I do if she touches me.... who said..... lay back and think of England. She was squirming all over the place during the scary bits and was practically on my lap when she nearly jumped out of her skin at one part. Anyway I settled down and I thought to myself I will just ask her at the end of the movie, I can't really speak to her now as I had just complained to the couple behind to keep quiet.
I'm watching the movie, it now only has about 30 mins to go, a family come in and sit in the row to my left, 2 adults with two 4/5 year old children, how stupid, the kids aren't going to watch an adults movie and of course they were crying and running around the rows... and would you believe it the mum then played hide and seek with them...... honest this is all so true.. she went down 3 or 4 rows and hid until the kids found her.... so selfish and distracting....could it get any worse..... yes it could and did !!!
Only about 15 mins to go of the film... why would anyone come in at these late times during films... it can't be to watch the movie as you have missed most of it, this young couple then sit down right in front of me..... someones having a laugh aren't they, this cinema holds over 300 people.... so why is everyone that comes in sits next to me ?
If I was in the UK I would be looking out for Jeremy Beadle.
These 2 then proceed to get their cell phones out and start texting, the bright light of the phone lights up like a belisha beacon in a darkened cinema, not only that but they start to have a conversation too... not in a whisper but as if they were sitting in a cafe drinking coffee............. I can't take any more... " excuse me I am trying to listen to this movie " that was very polite of me as I was actually thinking other words in my mind.... they both looked round at me as if I was some sort of looney but they did stop for a while. I knew it couldn't last as the young man would have to show his girl that he is not going to be told by a foreigner, he has to save face ( which is sooooo important here ) so with a few mins to go he started talking again but at that point I didn't care and was just glad of the small respite that I had.
So there I am, with a strange girl sitting next to me, a couple in front txting and talking and finally a mother playing hide and seek with her 2 kids !!!!! and you wonder why I am a cantankerous old git !!
The movie ends and I ask the girl next to me " why did you sit here when you had the whole cinema to choose from".. she just laughed and said " I just wanted to sit here" so I'm still not sure about it !! I reckon that she hoped that I would talk to her and maybe take her out that evening, she kept making comments to me during the film and kept getting up close and personal during the scary parts. She probably couldn't resist my sexy body or maybe it was because I'm a white "rich" foreigner... ok I'll believe what I want and you can believe the truth !! ;-))
It's lucky that I'm a good Catholic boy........ that's a nice saying but of course I'm not really... actually I'm on the other side of the fence I suppose. I guess "a good Anglican boy" just doesn't sound the same.
I've never had so much happen to me as I have had in the Phils...
Are my posts getting too long.... who is brave enough to say "yes".
Hope you are all having a great Tuesday
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5 comments:
Hi Gerard,
I see you've gone and done it. I mean booked your flight to Mindanao. When are you going,how long are you going for and how long is the flight?
I had a laugh at the antics in the cinema, it could only happen to you. Why didnt you say "Yes you sit here and I'll move on".I think she was after your sexy body or something.......
I cant believe they use mobile phones in a cimema, is there no notices to tell them to turn off. By the way what was the film.
No your blog isnt too long but getting interesting and funny.
Take care
Lol
Anne xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Hi Anne, You're early tonight!! Going out are we !! I leave for Mindanao tomorrow (Thursday) morning, the flight is just over the hour and I don't know how long that I will stay there.
In a cinema you wouldn't be prepared enough to say what you suggest, anyway she was a pretty girl and I am a man !!
No there is no notices or warnings to say switch off their phones, they even use them on aircraft when they do get a warning, if I knew who to complain to I would do so in writing..... as I am a cantankarous old git.
Does that mean my blog wasn't interesting and funny before !!!
I had to say that, I remember all the years of saying to women...."no your bum doesn't look too big in that dress" only to be told "does that mean it did in the other".... "no but".... let me out of this hole !!!
I really hated those situations as you can't win whatever you say.
Anne, forgot to say the film was called " I am a legend" starring Will Smith, not worth watching unless you are into scary movies about zombies... not my cup of tea but it did bring an interesting although annoying experience, and the aircon in cinemas is supberb.
Hi (is it me) no Gerard that would have infuriated me too, I would have to have said something ... that is so rude, no consideration for others, I thought the Phils were very respectful people (certainly not in the cinemas) I was going to go and see that movie this week, maybe I should start playing hide and seek and see the response I get, (Keys your het), remember that..everything is going good, I spoke to Anne today, what a bad cough she had, but its getting better now... so you are off to Mindanao, you will have to be extra, extra careful there, watch your every..every move, but still do enjoy yourself..will be thinking about you.. take care.. luv Mary....
Hi Mary, generally they ae very respectful, I'm not trying to make excuses here as I think talking in cinemas is very rude. I think that is the way it has always been for them, families sitting around watching a movie, talking and eating. They need to be re-educated regarding civil behavior, this could be done by the cinemas putting out a warning on screen to the effect please do not talk and switch off your phone.
Are you into zombie type movies, it was well made but basically a crap storyline with zombies trying to eat him !!! Each to their own !!
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